introductory entry.

salam.

owh dear,i knew this would happen.i was too busy tagging people asses i have no time to even read whatmore write my own blog.well,i'm still breathing fyi.not in repiratory distress to be exact(i was a few days back but let us forget the past,will ya?)hehe.

so how's my new life treating me?erm...it was sucks big time for the past 14 days.i got scolded by my superiors depending on how many times i presented case in clinic.even when i'm writing patients' charts or while walking during rounds  my ears tend to get this nasty way of im-being nice-but-at-the-same-time-i-hate-the-way-u-work kinda of advice.i don't mind being scolded for my mistakes but what pissed me off the most is when there are people who acted like they are damn good in everything just because they mastered the hands-on work after they've been doing the same things for the past erm..a year and a half kot and yet their brain seemed so empty it echoes when u drop a needle in it.come on....if you train a 10 year old kid to do blood takings and branulla settings everyday,i bet that kid can do it with one eye close after a year++ of training.so nothing xtraordinary with that.please la.u are nothing but stupid by being arrogant just because u started earlier than me and managed to finish ward works so effortlessly but when people asked you how to get ABSI(ankle-brachial systolic index) and what the normal level u have to ask people next to you for the answer.u are just plain stupid!if u tak tahu jawab tak mengapa but when u buat2 tahu and pandang org sebelah mata that what makes ur level even lower than my juniors in uni.

ok.enough bitching.i hate being one of the bad guys in movie u know..haha.

i 'm currently still adjusting to my new life to be honest and owh boy,it's so hard in the beginning..but a friend of mine once told me that each day that passes will make things better.i expect no miracle but i really hope what she said is right.

dear God,i depend on you solely to guide me thru and please make me stronger to face whatever challenges that awaits for me in future for my path is still bleak and only on you i put my confidence that one day everything will turn out right and so i will be just fine in my chosen path.

nawaitu lilla hitaa'la.

something to be grateful for

salam.

alhamdulillah,induction was over yesterday.it's a relief actually because we had to strain our ears for nearly 10 hours per day untuk dengar ceramah during the induction!i think 6x per day meals is not gud enough to bribe us for that 10 hours torture we had endured,seriously.haha.besides listening to loads of ceramah,i also managed to make some new friends there.all the best with your postings guys!may God ease every path we take :)

waaahhh..tak sgka this monday dah kerja.and sedar tak sedar the year nearly draws its curtain down.can u believe it's already nov?rasa mcm mgu lepas bru attend my graduation day :P.tuptuptup nti dh masuk januari dan skrg bila masa free yg byk dulu mcm akn vanish soon baru nk rasa gelabah wedding prep tak buat lagi.hmmm.....*rasa nak masuk fantasy zone and dissappear sekejap*

oklah.actually i rasa bad mood harini.rasa panas semacam.nk kate hot flush,i masih muda lah kan.haha.so i guess that's it for today.take care and see you soon.iA.

always a silver lining.

salam.

i igt i nk tulis ni on monday but since i tak tahu keadaan i mcm mana comes monday nti..i decided to just write it now.i got a call for induction this monday and finally i boleh pergi tanpa apa-apa halangan lagi.it's gonna be on monday till friday.i hope the activities are gong to be exciting(well not to expect much since induction means loads of ceramah!).i dunno how many times i said this to syir but i'm really not in the mood of packing.let it be last minute this time.i wont die of not having enough clothes to wear or toiletteries to use,would i?:P

once induction starts,i immediately have to think about working already because i only have weekend to prepare before i register with the  head of department in any given hospital.so this monday is induction,next monday is working time!honestly i'm scared yet thrilled to become a real doctor.the word 'real' there means bigger responsibilities.tapi i akn selalu igt dalam kerja mst kena ikhlas dan iAllah Allah akn mempermudahkan semua.

dulu masa bru-bru grad,i cakap dlm hati i nak bercuti smp syir sign-off and sign-on kembali.but i didn't mean it.ye lah,klau nk tgu syir naik balik mmg berbulan2 lah i jobless.tp nampaknya Allah kabulkan permintaan kecil i tu(so next time becareful of what u're wishing for).nak kata mnyesal tak la,cuma sian family kena tanggung i yg tak bekerja ni.hehe.so skrg both of us pun nk start kerja balik.bila nk bid him goodbye tdi i cam sgt sedih.ntah2 yg tadi tu last kitorang jmpa.klau dia kena panggil sign-on time i induksi mmg that's it!6bulan lagi la kot baru akn jumpa dia lagi.rasa nk menangis je dlm kereta tp tu la..bila terlalu sedih nk menangis pun tak boleh.

so dear self,
Allah akn permudahkan segala dan menyayangi org-org yg sabar :)

p/s:smlm first time i nampak muka kecewa dia and my heart broke.rasa nk cakap je ngan dia jgn sedih dan kecewa sbb i akn ada dgn dia smp mati,iAllah.

a tale of a nightmare.

salam.


yesterday i had a dream..in the dream,there's a lady around my age.she stood on a swing,swinging.she's  tall,slim,short-haired(almost like a boy-cut) and dark-skinned(hitam manis dalam bahasa melayu).she's not so beautiful but sweet.the kind that u wanna look again if u were happened to have a glance at her(or accidentally terpandang).everything about her is opposite me(except the not so beautiful part la sbb word beautiful dengan i..errr...tak seswai)in that dream,she's my fiance's girlfriend.ewww..marah tak?

sbb mimpi tu,i was down the whole day yesterday.i hope it's just purely a nightmare!fullstop.

a day worth spent.

salam.

yesterday ada org tu bwk i jln2.main-main air sket and tgok2 binatang.best dpt pgg anak harimau yg comel dan i rasa nk bawak balik rumah and bela jdi my pet.tp tu la..kecik2 boleh la main-main.klau dah besar silap2 i  pun dia mkn.huhu.rilex betul.rasa tenang and best.mungkin ini la hikmah tak selalu berjumpa.darah manis tak elok juge selau jumpa2 kan.hehe?

surat induksi i dh smp semalam.tp malangnya i kena defer atas sebab2 tertentu.but i really hope by nov i dah boleh start kerja.dan ofis pun dah start memanggil encik kesayangan saya kembali ke laut.cepat rasanya dah hampir 3 bulan dia cuti.kalau ikutkan hati tak puas lagi nk cuti sama-sama maklumla ni first time i dpt spend full-length holiday ngan dia.selalu samada i balik the last month of his holiday atau tak dpt sama-sama trus.tapi a small part of me dah tak kisah sgt nk start kerja or dia belayar sbb what will wait for us after dia belayar mmg lumayan(not money-wise but relationship wise la) dan i kena start kerja cepat untuk nk laksanakan menda tu. :)

and org tu cakap lg dia tak sabar nk tgok i kerja.i know darl,,i pun mcm tak sabar nk kerja.w'pun i takut fikir kemungkinan yg akn dtg,i akn cuba kuat dan kerja seikhlas hati macam u..

oklah readers....nti bila ada cerita menarik nk bgtahu i akn write again.till then take care alright :)

unemployed.

salam.

now i started to feel bored just staying at home.i need to work.i want my mind to start working again.to leave it dormant for too long is no good right.i hope the long holiday i'm having now is enough so that i won't feel any regrets when i start working soon.i need to socialise again.get some fresh air,be in a new environment and meet some new faces.on top of that this long holiday starts to annoy everyone around me.like how i slept till mid-day that bugged my mum so much,and how i harrassed my fiance with so many texts day and night like celcom tu company i yang punya.haha.so there goes.at least work will deviate my attention from sleeping,going to malls or asking my sister to bring her baby sister jln2 and thinking about syir obsessively.haha.luckily my desire to shop has ceased.thank God.finally ,my prayer has been answered!

i think i'm ready to embrace another phase of life.no matter how much i love my student life,i have to move on.forward.

p/s:i think i'm going to miss syir terribly when i start working and esp when he start sailing but i will always remember  that abscence makes heart grow fonder.dont u agree?

bravo.

salam.

mak had been down with flu and cough and was under the weather for quite sometimes roughly since she came back from perfoming umrah.at first she cought a cold then came the vigorous episodes of productive then dry cough.i kesian gile tgok her old fragile body straining to cough out the phlegm.then after that she's been vomiting right after she ate something.macam emesis gravidarum pun ada(org mengandung tu :D) hehe.i noticed now she's a bit slimmer due to the many infections she has caught.but good news,that  now she's recovering.not completely but i could see the appetite is coming back and she's already gone out doing her daily chores back(u know buying groceries,watering the plants etc...).and seeing mak smiles again is the best thing ever to me.

bravo mak for your strong spirit to get well.stay healthy and beautiful alright?muaaahhss!